How to Stop Self-Sabotaging and Start Thriving -

Saying ‘I CAN’ instead of ‘I CAN’T’

On a previous blog post I talked about how our words matter. Even more so, how we talk to ourselves matters. We are all capable of self-sabotaging. This can be through procrastination, doubt, or anxiety. There are multiple reasons we tell ourselves ‘I can’t.’ This comes under the category of negative thinking.

Often, those with low self-esteem have a negative self-image and they self-prophecy failure prior to the completion of a project. For example, it may have began from past experiences that have impacted you today. The memory holds negative emotions in your mind and you want to protect yourself. It takes a lot of willpower, strength and courage to go from I can’t to I can.

Self-sabotaging and what it is

An act of omission and commission, what we do knowingly or unknowingly. In essence, we are actively shutting down. Self-sabotaging is often seen as a coping mechanism as said before as a way to protect yourself. Protecting yourself from stressful situations. In the argument of sink or swim, this is the sinking option. The opposite of self-sabotage is self-improvement. When we are self-sabotaging we are demeaning ourselves and our general progress.

It is a negative trait that inhibits our daily routine. We can face this in multiple scenarios. For instance, an individual who wants to learn music might react negatively if a piece isn’t going well. This reaction can lead them to procrastinate and stop practicing. On the other hand, another individual can have the trait that is known as perfectionism. They hold themselves to a higher standard, sometimes an impossible standard causing them to react negatively when things go wrong. This also can add more setbacks and delays.

With anything it takes time, patience and willingness to learn. We must learn to be patient with ourselves. We should also congratulate ourselves more on any small victories. These are steps forward on a journey of self-improvement.

You can move the mountain

Often, in life you will come against mountains or roadblocks. These are put there to test us. We can avoid them but a lot of the time they return, unless we can move through them. How do we do this? By believing in yourself. Faith can move mountains. What we tell ourselves does matter.

Negativity in our minds makes that mountain twice the size it is in reality. But if we bring a positive mindset into our daily lives, we tell ourselves I can. Then we will see that mountain from the other side. And in the end you will be twice as strong after walking through it.

Below are a list of books, workbooks and techniques that are useful guides to stop self-sabotaging: